Aug 282011


You’re out of town.

I didn’t give you permission to leave. I mean, of course I would have given you permission, but it would have been nice if you had asked. I expect you to ask.

As I understand it, I have a right to your “free time” outside of work. That’s what you offered and I accepted. But now it seems like your “free time” is “free time” as long as you define it as such? So I have the pleasure of having you if and when you want me to have you?

Not cool.

Aug 242011
stiletto heels for D S Relationship

Stilettos do come in women’s wide-width sizes! At least, I think they do. It’s also very possible that they are made for very short transvestites. There’s no way to be sure.

At Macy’s, a very tiny Asian man directed me to a beautiful pair of strappy, black, patent leather stilettos — my dream shoes! He even claimed they were comfortable, although I can’t imagine how he knew whether or not they were comfortable.

When I asked him if I could try on a pair in my size, he said, “Oh, I don’t work here…” and he walked away.

Short transvestite? Foot Fetishist? Stiletto Angel? I don’t care. I love him. :) They’re beautiful.

Aug 232011

After all of the lessons I learned on Day One of my shopping adventures, I was dumb enough to try again today. All I really want is a nice pair of stilettos I can wear in the bedroom. Shopping Day Two = failure. After hours wandering the mall with no luck, here is an approximation of the last conversation I had with a sales person before leaving the mall.

Conversation had at Neiman Marcus with a male salesperson, mid 40s, effeminate, possibly gay, at approximately 7pm:

Me: Do you have basic black stilettos in seven and a half, preferably sandals, and wide-widths if possible? I have fat feet. 

Employee: Our best sellers are a pair of [expensive brand] on sale for $199. They’re very comfortable, but I don’t believe stilettos are made in wide-widths.

Me: Stilettos are not comfortable. Do you have anything less expensive? I’m only wearing them for sex.

Employee: For what!?!?

Me: Forget it. Is there like… a ‘stiletto section’ you could point me to?

Employee: Our selections are organized by designer, not by type. [Expensive brand #1] is over there, and [expensive brand #2] is over there…

Me: But you have a whole section of overpriced flip flops of different brands on that wall. Do you have a section like that for fuck shoes?

Employee: [blank stare]

Me: Thanks anyway. [exeunt]

Aug 222011

I hate shopping with all of my heart. I stumbled around the mall for hours yesterday, and despite going home nearly empty handed, I did learn some invaluable lessons.

  • Do not walk into any store with a number or a fruit in the store name (Forever 21, Papaya, etc.). Stores like this carry skirts with hemlines so high that I’d have to introduce my pussy to people at parties: “Hi, I’m D. This is my pussy. We’re glad to meet you.” The clothes are cut for ‘tween sluts and working hookers.
  • At the mall, no one in lingerie boutiques or “intimate apparel” departments thinks that boob jokes are funny. I do not understand this. Perhaps the people there are forbidden to smile.
  • Humor is also forbidden. When I realized I was being watched by a waif sales girl at Victoria’s Secret after examining a pair of terribly over-priced panties for over five minutes, I smiled and explained, “I’m checking them for stretchy-ness.” She was not amused.
  • No one makes stilettos in wide-widths. I should have realized this.


Aug 202011

As part of my “research” to figure out who I am, what this is, and what I want, I’ve come across so many beautiful photos of stunning Dommes outfitted in second-skin latex, curve-hugging leather corsets, towering on fantastic stiletto heels.

Okay, maybe I’m not quite ready to lace myself into leather, but I’d love to find something black and lacy to wear the next time I see J. I know I want a pair of sexy stilettos, and at least, I can wear them to the office–under sensible slacks, of course.

I think it’s time to go shopping. I don’t generally like shopping, but shopping for sexy stuff sounds like fun.  :)