May 212012
BDSM Lexicon Entry #19: Gender-Neutral Pronoun

gender-neutral pronoun, n.: a pronoun that isn’t associated with a gender.

“Do you find it ironic that you prefer gender-neutral pronouns but your name is “Guy Masculano”?”

Examples of nominative gender-neutral pronouns include: ne, e, ey, hu, hy, ot, yt, thon, ve, xe, ze, zhe, en, co, phe, per, yo, hen, shklee, and ĝi. I’d like to take this opportunity to propose my own: “uck” …as in, “go uck yourself.” … [read more]

Apr 232012
BDSM Lexicon Entry #18: Trigger Warning

trigger warning, n.: text that alerts readers that subsequent content might “trigger” strong or otherwise negative responses such as flashbacks, thoughts of self-harm, or extreme emotional distress.

“I’ve been really emotional since accidentally backing over Fluffy with the car. I wish those Geico commercials aired with a trigger warning… every time I see that gecko, I burst into tears.”… [read more]

Apr 162012
BDSM Lexicon Entry #17: Top Drop

top drop, n.: a dominant’s feelings of guilt, depression, panic and/or worry after dominating a submissive partner during BDSM activity.

Q: How do I help my dominant partner avoid top drop?

A: Make her a sandwich. Then, offer her your ass. If that doesn’t work, you could always try telling her how much you “enjoyed” the beating, how perfectly spaced your marks are, how in the days to come, your butt-hurt will be a beautiful reminder of how well she owned your ass.… [read more]

Mar 232012
BDSM Lexicon Entry #16: Butt Plug

butt plug, n.: a sex toy designed for insertion in the anus. Typically, butt plugs have a tapered end for insertion and wide base to prevent the toy being lost in the rectum.

“After accidentally knocking it into a butt plug, I had to burn my toothbrush.”

“Don’t ever wear a butt plug during allergy season. I won’t get into the details, but once, I sneezed too hard and lost both my favorite wine glass and my dignity.”… [read more]

Mar 112012
BDSM Lexicon Entry #15: Queening

Sometimes a dominant just needs a quiet moment and the only way to shut up a chatty sub is to find other ways to keep her sub’s mouth occupied. Besides that, tops may enjoy being able to control where their submissives’ tongues and lips touch them and the feeling of dominance that comes from literally sitting on someone’s face.