Jan 102015
 

anonymous female in photo frame

 Invasive questions, forward requests, and ‘helpful’ website suggestions from readers.

Have you ever posted a picture of yourself on here for your readers to see?

Yes, I have posted a photo or two! You can find them in one or more of the 581 posts I’ve written here. Go fish. :)

I’m feeling some entitlement in your question and it rubs me the wrong way. You do realize I don’t owe you anything, right? Go find someone elses photo to jerk off to / throw darts at / draw a mustache on.

I’ve been reading your blog first entry to newest in the last couple of days and it has turned into a page-turner. The only thing I really, really wish for is that you’d add a “go to page X” link somewhere. It’s annoying and a waste of time that when I’ve stopped at page 87 and wish to go back there to continue reading, I have click through all the previous pages (well, every second one at least) to get there.

Please forward your usability suggestion to our web design team by clicking the X in your browser tab.

…or just tack the page number onto the end of the URL, you lazy fuck: http://dumbdomme.com/page/X

Hi! Any chance I can commission you to write a blog post on Dumb Domme?

Silly you! :) I write blog posts on Dumb Domme all the time… for free!

Wait… do you mean ‘commission a blog post’ for your crappy sex toy, questionable escort agency, or poorly written e-book?

No. Fuck no.

Any chance of a how to basic bondage series?

No. That sounds tedious and boring.

So this is a really personal question that you are so entitled to be offended. Do you enjoy vaginal penetration?

Not with you.

Also, thanks for giving me permission to be offended!

You should change your name.

Lean in close… really close… I’m going to tell you a secret…

Dumb Domme isn’t my real name.

 

  6 Responses to “questions, requests, and suggestions”

  1. =D As ever, your smackdown answers to entitled douchebag questions are pretty much the highlight of my week.

    What the fuck is it with the photo thing too?! I get this question quite a lot as well, with people saying things like ‘oh do you know what? I think your readers would love to have a look at a picture of your tits/ass/crotch region.’ What’s that you say? The internet likes porn? You SHOCK ME, reader! I never knew! I find it odd that people think this suggestion is a helpful one, as opposed to, say, a pretty ignorant assumption to make in the face of a blogger who has very clearly made specific decisions about what to post and when.

  2. Wait!!!!! Dumb Domme isn’t your real name?! I feel so betrayed! Now everything, all those countless nights posting on your blog is just lies I tell you LIES!! *cries hysterically*

    Respectfully,
    Mysticlez

  3. I must say sometimes your kindness and sincerity is can make my day.

    Mike

  4. You do realize that sometimes people cannot type an address directly in the browser tap?

    Like, when your computer is broken because your dumb-ass boyfriend kicked it down the stairs, and you use your phone instead?

    I liked your blog so much that I spent hours reading it on my phone. After I kicked the now ex-boyfriend out. I spent two nights reading it because it helped me regain my self-confidence. And yeah, after jumping from page 90… to 88.. to 86.. to 84… (oh, on a phone it takes only like one minute loading time for each page… but that is what dedicated readers go through, right?) I dared make the go-to-page-x suggestion. Cause that is what many other blogs have. The one i used to write, for example.

    Boy does it feel that you now call me a lazy fuck. You make fun of me just so you can have a witty remark in your post.

    You know, not all of us have a home pc plus a laptop we can use any time. Sometimes all you have is a shitty phone that you use, reading a blog of a person you admire. A phone that only has a shitty google app and no way of typing directly in the browser tap. I spent these two nights reading your stuff, sitting on the stairs of a cheap motel cause that was the only place where i could plug my phone in. But yeah, to u i am just a lazy fuck cause i dared make a common suggestion.

    Sometimes just consider why you want to insult folks so badly.

    Yours sicerely,
    your lazy fuck,
    still typing all of this on my phone,
    and who will not be following your blog any more.

    • Sometimes just consider why you want to insult folks so badly.

      Because some folks are lazy, entitled, rude, and melodramatic/manipulative. You, for example. And if I were to give you the benefit of the doubt, then I’d say that perhaps you weren’t all of those things, but your earlier message and this one certainly are.

      FYI, type “http://dumbdomme.com/page/X” into your Google App. Go ahead… I’ll wait…

      You’re welcome.

      And not that you’ll read anything more I have to say after such an epic flounce (you get an A for effort, but a C- for execution)… but in a day or two, I’ll be glad to explain why your message was rude, entitled, and mildly offensive. And for funsies, I’ll also explain why your above comment is ridiculous and MORE than worthy of being made fun of. I look forward to it.

      Best to you, Susan. Really.

      Now go away.

  5. Hi! Any chance I can commission you to write a blog post on Dumb Domme?

    Ugh, people who think you haven’t monetized your blog yet because you’re too stupid to figure out how all by yourself. Fortunately it doesn’t happen often (I probably just jinxed myself by saying that), but once in a while I get an email from some schmuck who thinks I’ve spent the last few years blogging in hopes that someone will pay me a couple bucks to essentially shit on my blog. Shockingly enough, no, I don’t want shitty paid content on my site, and no, I will not put ads that I don’t have complete control over on it either. If anyone makes money off my blog, it’s going to be me.

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