Jul 302014
good sex, bad metaphors

I’ve been remiss in not talking about the sex. I guess it’s breakup sex. Pre-breakup sex? I’m not sure. Anyway, it’s really, really good sex. The other day, when I said we were just hitting our stride in the bedroom — I was incorrect. If we’re borrowing running/race metaphors here, then the more accurate description might be: We’re like horny cheetahs… in a decathlon… with dildos. I don’t know. I’m not good with metaphors. It’s definitely marathon sex, but with lots of different events, and also, I finish more often than once every three hours. ;) My metaphors are bad, … [read more]

Jul 262014
our collar

His collar.   My collar.   Our collar.† I don’t collect mementos. I don’t have folders of old love letters, boxes of souvenirs, or curios full of keepsakes. I don’t like clutter in my physical environment and I don’t like clutter in my head. Keeping my surroundings simple is easy, but my brain is a different story — it’s a constant struggle to simplify, prioritize, and focus. Because there’s so much going on in my head about the present and the future, I don’t have the energy or the mental space to deal with junk from the past. For that reason, I don’t want … [read more]

Jul 232014
d/s breakup: what to do with my submissive's collar?

Almost three years ago, I made J a collar. I don’t know why I made it — I knew I’d never be able to give it to him. It felt too symbolic, too laden with meaning. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a sucker for meaning, but it has to be organic. Giving J a collar I made with my own two hands seemed like artificially ascribing meaning to an object it wouldn’t otherwise have. It felt like forced symbolism — because the signifier was manufactured and artificially imbued, and because the signified concept wasn’t even possible. But I made it. … [read more]

Jul 212014
in defense of (mostly) infallible memory

We should go out and do something, but not sure what. How about Hard Rock? The Hard Rock… Casino? *confused* What for?. You said you always wanted to go. No I didn’t. I never said I wanted to go to the Hard Rock. You did! You said you wanted to go to the casino. Casino?! That wasn’t me. Maybe you’re thinking of a conversation with some other woman. *smile* I wouldn’t have said that — I’m not into gambling. Exactly! That’s why I remember it — because it was an odd thing for you to say. Your memory is off. I … [read more]

Jul 152014
all the sex things

Dammit. I feel like we’re just hitting our stride in the bedroom. We’ve been fucking for over three years, but because we’re in a driving distance relationship, we haven’t had the opportunity to fuck as often as other couples. While some relationships hit the ‘boring sex rut’ around this time, we’re just now getting good at fucking. It was always good (we always had the chemistry), but now it’s mind-blowingly good… all the time. pinball brain on hiatus In part, it’s because I’m way less in my head than I’ve ever been. J’s leaving, so I don’t have the time … [read more]