Mar 302014
 

Kissed and beaten, loved and fucked — he had been dismantled, rearranged, and reassembled until he was less himself and more mine.

His eyes glassy and unfocused, he is both entirely present and a million miles away. He is here and he is gone, and what remains of him is mine.

Without weapons and stripped of armor, he has no defense against my incantations; I speak directly to his soul. I whisper sweet, sick words of adoration and possession, invoking love and violence, on what I’ve taken and what I want.

I want my words inside his head, not just for now, but for always. I want to write myself onto his heart.

In the middle of my murmuring, I hear my voice, not as I intend it, but as it is — pleading, anxious, and unsure. I’m not asserting ownership; I’m nearly begging, willing him to be mine.

When my voice trails off, he swallows hard and begins whispering his own words. They’re incoherent articulations, emotive utterances saying nothing in particular, but they mean the world to me.

I give him room to ramble, but I’m not sure what he’s saying.

Just before he’s silent, his cadence asks for a response.

Pushing breath past the tightness in my throat, I answer.

“I love you too, sweet boy.”


thumbnail image: “The Lovers” (1525) by Giulio Romano. (cropped) Work is in the public domain.

  23 Responses to “whispered words”

  1. Lovely… strong and vulnerable. My favorite paradox.

    • Thanks, Night Owl. It’s one of my favorite paradoxes too… though I’m not sure I love being in it so much as seeing it in others. :)

      • “… though I’m not sure I love being in it so much as seeing it in others. :)”

        I hear that. I am always surprised at the rewards I get when I allow space for the vulnerability, though.

  2. I agree with Night Owl. Strong and vulnerable. The flow of it is beautiful.

  3. Stripped bare and no protective layers left… on either of you. Very raw, intimate, beautiful, hard. Thank you for sharing it.

    • Stripped bare and no protective layers left… on either of you.

      It’s strange and lovely how that state is contagious, and it always catches me off guard when I find myself in it. :)

      Thanks for the kind words, DC.

  4. The raw beauty and imagery is so poignant and stunning. Thank you for this.

  5. ”he has no defense against my incantations; I speak directly to his soul”

    No one has ever been able to do this to me before, but you make it sound like a truly wonderful experience… Something to hope for. Lovely post!

  6. You do an amazing job of capturing these beautiful moments in words. Reading this, I feel like I’m practically there. I have no idea what J looks like, but I can visualize him shifting a little bit just to be that much closer to you at the end.

  7. ((HUGS)) You’re imprinted on each other’s hearts – it seems you’re as much his as he is yours if even for just a brief moment.

  8. I just finished reading all you wrote, from the day you started this blog.

    Thank you for sharing so much so eloquently and so honestly.

    HUGS – Tish

    • I just finished reading all you wrote, from the day you started this blog.

      Oh! Thank you for telling me — this is an incredible compliment!

      Thank you for sharing so much so eloquently and so honestly.

      Thank you for reading, and letting me know you read — it means the world. *Hugs* :)

      Best,
      D

  9. It’s these quiet moments that bring forth tender deepness. The pauses, gaps and silences between acts that expand my mind. When my Owner and I are playing, I ache for these moments – and Your exquisite rendering reminds me how blessed I am to submit. Thank You.

    • Thank you for the wonderful comment, James. Your owner is lucky to have someone to appreciates moments like this, and you’re both lucky to experience them together. :)

  10. Staggering. Thank you for that.

  11. This speaks a novel’s worth of emotion in such a few words. Absolutely amazing. Made me breathless.

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