Aug 152013
 

My first blog post was two years ago today. On the occasion of my two year anniversary, I give you numbers, words, and the self-centered rambling you’ve come to expect.

avi-bg-anniversary
Numbers:

191,193 words written (approximately)
10,000 tweets Twittered (almost!)
400 posts published
205 posts unpublished (ideas, drafts, & abandoned)
21 posts picked up by Fleshbot
18 posts submitted to e[lust] 9 months since J discovered my ‘secret’ blog
6 posts submitted to e[lust] that made it to thetop 3
5 pairs of shoes I’ve broken since I started the blog
3 reader/commenter/Twitter crushes I’ve developed over the past two years


Word Frequency Cloud (top 100):

2-years-word-cloud-100-sm


Fucknalysis:

I’ve written ‘fuck,’ or some variation on ‘fuck,’ 605 times. Those variations include ‘fucks’ and ‘fucking,’ of course, but also ‘fuckingawesomeorgasm,’ ‘fuckable,’ ‘fuckoff,’ and ‘fuckmenistan.’ FYI, I’ve used the word ‘sex’ 74 times, ‘screw’ six times, and ‘hump’ five times.

gave-fucks


Ramblings:

I renewed my domain name two weeks ago, so I’ll have this space for at least another year. :)

But I’m still not sure I’ll have J for another year — his career is currently up in the air. As the days pass, it looks more and more like he’ll be sticking around for a while, but there’s little peace in that. Besides the fact that he could up and leave at any time, when things look good for me (I’ll probably have him a while longer), it means things look worse for him (here isn’t where he wants to be for his career).

Besides all of that, just like last year, I’m still not entirely sure what I’m doing here.

I started writing here to help me ‘figure things out,’ but there’s not been a lot of that happening lately. In part, that’s due to my slowly (but steadily) increasing facility and confidence in navigating this relationship. In part, that’s due to J’s having found out about the blog.

For the past couple of months, I think this space has been less about about me figuring things out and more about me making a written record of our relationship. I’ve come to embrace the idea of chronicling J and I. We won’t last forever, and it’s important to me to record some memory of us before we disappear (it could be weeks or years, we’ll never know). As I’ve suggested before, I don’t think I’ll continue writing here after our relationship is over. Perhaps I’ll write something else (somewhere else), but not here. This space is about who I am now, and after J leaves, I won’t be that person anymore.

Besides all of that, I’m ready to admit I’m an attention whore. (I’ve said it before, but now I really believe it). I fucking LOVE positive feedback. And, if it’s not already completely obvious, I think I’m in love with my own voice. I’m perpetually surprised that I’m not ‘discovered,’ picked up by some online women’s magazine, or included somewhere on a list of ‘best bloggers.’ I’m motivated to write, both by an enormous ego and by low self-esteem. Yes, those two things coexist and conflict, heartily and often. It’s the way I operate.

Meh…?

Will you raise a glass with me in celebration of two years worth of ramblings, relationship issues, embarrassing moments, and hot sex?

Cheers. :)

 

  50 Responses to “two year anniversary”

  1. *sings* “And a 1 Dominant in high heels!” Oh sorry wrong song. Happy Anniversary

    Respectfully,
    mysticlez

    • *sings* “And a 1 Dominant in high heels!” Oh sorry wrong song. Happy Anniversary

      Hey, I appreciate that much more than you singing “Happy Blogibirthary.” :)

  2. I think you should be discovered, picked up by a woman’s magazine, and published on a list of best bloggers. I will be sorry when you go, but I do understand, from watching so many of my favorite bloggers move on, that it is a transient rite of passage. We come, spill our souls and hearts on the page, and then move on to the next form of resolution.

    To all of us attention-whore women bloggers of enormous ego and low self-esteem – Happy Anniversary!

    • I think you should be discovered, picked up by a woman’s magazine, and published on a list of best bloggers

      Thank you, night owl. :) Now, if you know anyone and could put in a good word for me, I’ll be famous in no time!

      To all of us attention-whore women bloggers of enormous ego and low self-esteem

      I’m just glad to know that there are more like me out there. :)

  3. I am sitting here at 2:30am, just in from work, and need a beer REAL badly. So, this one’s for you! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!… In fact, I think I’ll make it TWO!!! CHEERS!!!

    I love your blog (NUMBER PORN!!! *swoon*) and I hope it stays around for a long time. Of course, if you should ever decide to leave, I hope that you at least leave a trail of bread crumbs behind so I can at least follow you. At my age, I’ve become a lousy stalker so if you wouldn’t mind leaving slowly and leave LOTS of clues behind, it would be much appreciated.

    “We won’t last forever, and it’s important to me to record some memory of us before we disappear (it could be weeks or years, we’ll never know)”

    This makes me sad to read. I hope it’s years, as opposed to weeks or months, and I hope you two can squeeze all the happiness you can out of it!

    “And, if it’s not already completely obvious, I think I’m in love with my own voice.”

    … And a lovely voice it is too! Ever since the first time I ran across it, your blog has been on my “must read” list, and believe me, there are VERY few on that very short list. I love your humor, insight, and honesty. It’s a fun read and even if i don’t always comment, I’m still lurking in the background. (*giggle* That may, or may not be such a comforting thought)

    Anyway, happy anniversary!!! And *hugs*

    • need a beer REAL badly. So, this one’s for you! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!… In fact, I think I’ll make it TWO!!! CHEERS!!!

      I really hope that BOTH beers were for me, right? RIGHT!?

      trail of bread crumbs behind so I can at least follow you. At my age, I’ve become a lousy stalker so if you wouldn’t mind leaving slowly and leave LOTS of clues behind

      Perhaps, but then again, if I’m feeling dramatic, I might do some sort of epic flounce. Probably not, but still. Ok, maybe I won’t flounce, but I’ll tell you what I would do if I was going to flounce. Howabout that?

      Thanks for all of the lovely, kind words, Stephen. :)

  4. Congratulations.

    The orginal charter of the BBC said that it’s brief was to inform, educate, and entertain. Your posts do just that. Please keep them coming.

  5. Congratulations.

    The orginal brief of the BBC was to ‘inform, educate, and entertain’. You do all of these in your usual witty, charmingly self-deprecatory manner. Please keep them coming.

  6. Congratulations (at the third attempt).

    The original brief of the BBC was to ‘inform, educate, and entertain’, all of which you do in a witty and charmingly self-deprecatory manner.

    Please keep those posts coming.

  7. Happy Anniversary…. it’s not easy to sustain a blog and keep it fresh and entertaining. Trust me, I know.

    But what does it take to get on your “crush” list?

    The academically curious,

    Mick

    • But what does it take to get on your “crush” list?

      It all comes down to pretty words, a thoughtful voice, and beautiful reactions.

      Or a pony. If someone buys me a pony, she or he can be on my crush list. Or a sloth. I think sloths are really cute.

  8. I don’t have much to improve on the above (slapshot, especially, speaks for me in this), so . . .

    Cheers!

  9. Congrats! These milestones are fun to asses.

    • Thanks, H.H. They are fun! I’ve been doing some word frequency analysis on my writing here and I am REALLY surprised at what I’ve found… maybe I’ll share sometime next week. :)

  10. Well I will raise a glass with you “A toast to two years and running, congratulations!!”

  11. Congratulations on your two years! I really enjoy your attention whoring and hope you continue for a long while yet.

    Ferns

  12. Happy anniversary! *hugs with groping*

  13. Hell, I feel seriously lazy looking at your stats.

    Happy anniversary!

  14. Skål, Santé, Shláinte!! I raise a glass in your honor. Thank you for the many words that brighten, confuse, and occasionally frustrate me. I hope for many more! I will also add my wish to “slapshot’s” of a trail, however faint, to follow where you lead. All the very best…

    • Thank you for the many words that brighten, confuse, and occasionally frustrate me.

      Ha! Glad to hear it, as I’m also generally confused and frustrated with myself. It’s comforting to know I’m in good company!

  15. Congrats!!! While I don’t want to see you go… now I’m dying to see the flounce! LOL

    In the meantime, I will fantasize the happy solution to you’re problem… which I won’t tell you so as to not to cause any frustrations when you realize it’s probably impossible, because then you would have to tell me it’s impossible and that will ruin my fantasy and it MY DAMN FANTASY!!

    So you’ll live happily ever after somewhere in space! ;)

    • now I’m dying to see the flounce!

      I half planned a flounce last year. :) I couldn’t make it dramatic enough, so I just kept on writing instead. (kidding… a little)

      I will fantasize the happy solution to you’re problem… which I won’t tell you so as to not to cause any frustrations when you realize it’s probably impossible, because then you would have to tell me it’s impossible and that will ruin my fantasy and it MY DAMN FANTASY!!

      Aw. :) Well thank you. I imagine I’m very happy in your fantasy, and I think I’m okay with staying there!

  16. hi DD

    not much to say, first time commenter, wee whiley lurker. as im scotishand itsa friday night i’ll raise a glass to ya :) voddy n diet coke for me if anyone else is offering

  17. Thank you for 2 great years of engaging, entertaining, challenging, and sexy fun (and great graphics!)! You put a lot into this blog and it is definitely noticed. :) Ditto on the crumbs… if/when a move becomes necessary.

    happy blog-birthday!

  18. Woo-hoo.

    And hear hear!

    I’ll be writing my own version of this shortly, but suffice it to say, on at least two questions, you and I are in perfect agreement: we each are in love with our own voice, and we each are perpetually surprised at not being discovered.

    For good measure, I’m pretty fond of YOUR voice, and am pretty surprised YOU haven’t been discovered, too.

    • For good measure, I’m pretty fond of YOUR voice, and am pretty surprised YOU haven’t been discovered, too.

      Thanks, N. That makes two of us! Now if I could only find a couple thousand more people who felt the same way…

  19. Congratulations, and welcome to the “old-timer’s club” of blogs that make it past the six-month mark.

    And I wish I had known about the pony earlier, ‘cos I had bought you a little unicorn, but now I have to take it back. :-(

    • welcome to the “old-timer’s club” of blogs that make it past the six-month mark.

      Thanks Tom. You’re a bit late in welcoming me, though. I guess I’m as surprised as anyone else that I’m still here. :)

      And I wish I had known about the pony earlier, ‘cos I had bought you a little unicorn, but now I have to take it back.

      Do you still have the receipt? Those fuckers are hell to return without one.

  20. For every attention whore blogger there’s a fuck up with an unhealthy attachment to random strangers on the internet, so here’s for 2 years of awesome blogging, althought I only discovered it a few months ago.

    • For every attention whore blogger there’s a fuck up with an unhealthy attachment to random strangers on the internet,

      Thank goodness for that… otherwise, all of my whoring would be for nought. :)

  21. Congratulations, though I am a little sad that you may not continue here when J is gone.

    • Thanks, Cammies… and just keep your fingers crossed that he sticks around as long as possible! (but really, don’t, because that would make him sad. *sigh*)

  22. Congratulations! I raise a glass in your direction. Quite literally in fact, as I always have a cocktail when blogging/commenting and I know you’re to the East of me. Although not a vodka tonic. That’s a terrible drink (in my not particularly humble opinion). This particular glass has rum, lime, absinthe, cointreau and mint in it. So cheers! Hope you have many more posts about you and J to publish right here.

    -paltego

    • Thanks, paltego. :)

      That’s a terrible drink (in my not particularly humble opinion). This particular glass has rum, lime, absinthe, cointreau and mint in it.

      Did you just insult my drink of choice? :P

      About your current libation… with all those ingredients, does it also come with an umbrella and a maxi pad? ;) (kidding… a little. :) I’m not one for complicated drinks. They make me feel too much like a girl.)

      So cheers! Hope you have many more posts about you and J to publish right here.

      Cheers, friend. :) Here’s to many more and lots of happies for all of us!

  23. Congratulations on making it this far. I’ll sure be sad to see it go eventually. Finding your blog was one of the things that helped me dive in, looking for a person who wants the kind of relationship I do.

  24. Congratulations with two years of awesome blogging. Too bad I can’t share it with all my friends. Tell J that he can never leave, since 1) He’ll never find someone like you again, and 2) You might stop blogging. So no, we can’t have any of that. *raises glass towards you, spilling all over you* If he does, I’ll be here with a glass of wine, or ten! ;)

    • Congratulations with two years of awesome blogging. Too bad I can’t share it with all my friends.

      Thank you, and Ha! Too bad, indeed. :)

      Tell J that he can never leave, since 1) He’ll never find someone like you again, and 2) You might stop blogging.

      You’re damn right. The more time that passes, the more I’m convinced he’ll never find someone quite like me. I’m one in a million — both for my excellent features and my flaws. :)

      If he does, I’ll be here with a glass of wine, or ten! ;)

      I’m in. :)

  25. Cheers! And thanks – your blogs was one of the ones that made a difference for my wife and I….

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