Dec 172012
 

You have Qs. I have As. We’re a match made in heaven.


Q: Links or patties?

A: Chops.

Q: Could you tell me what your physical attributes are? Do you have long legs, nice ass, and what size boobs? Things like that. I would like to say that your writing is highly entertaining. I laugh out loud to some :)

A: I have a torso, two arms, two legs, and a head. My ass is nice enough, I guess. I don’t see my ass that often because it’s always behind me. I see my breasts all the time, though, and I’m happy to report they are breast-sized.


Q:
Something ive really puzzled about, is what are “butt plugs”? Might sound dumb, but i have no idea what or how they look like? Or used for? What’s the payoff from using them. And finally, have you or would you use them, and if yes, for what purpose DD. Thankyou

A: You’re in luck, my anally-inquisitive friend! I’m six credits away from receiving my Masters Degree in Butt Plugs.  For a general definition, description, usage, and for the answer to whether or not I use butt plugs, see “BDSM Lexicon Entry #16: Butt Plugs.” If you’re interested in a more in-depth (ha!) discussion, I’ve written about the differences between butt plugs and anal dilators. Besides that, I also own a small army of butt plugs… Also, why don’t you just Google it? Wait… here, let me Google that for you.


Q.
Oh grate an mighty Mistress, will You please peg me exactly the way i have fantasized it in every detail, living to fulfill my fantasy the way i have always imagined serving You as the most prefect salve of all time while listening to Steely Dan, dressed as a My Little Pony fury without using a safe word or even the slightest bit of could You please my fulfill of mighty Mistress of the most wonderful of all. Please?

A: Sure! I don’t have any plans this afternoon. [And yes, I knew this was your “question,” boots, thanks for the laugh!  :) ]


Q:
Your post on the strap-on was interesting. I have been trying to get one for my wife that will give her stimulation when she wears it so she can orgasm. She used to have one but it went bad and they don’t make that model. Do the regular strap-ons give clitoral stimulation like the one you mentioned in the blog? Enough for orgasm? Or should I stick with just trying to get one with a vibrating egg? Help, she wants one.

A: First, you’ve got to get the vocab straight. When people say “strap-on,” they’re generally referring to a harness and a dildo together. So, when you say “a regular strap-on,” I’m not sure what you mean — I’m assuming you mean a dildo? If so, the answer is no, a regular dildo in a harness doesn’t give the driver much clitoral stimulation. Some harnesses are designed so the base of the dildo puts pressure on the clitoral area, but in my experience, those don’t provide enough stimulation to get me off. You might look into a dildo that has a “pony” end for vaginal insertion. Some of them, like the Feeldoe line, allow you to insert a bullet vibe into the pony end. I’ve purchased and used a couple more harnesses and dildos (some with pony/driver ends and some without) since my earlier posts on the Feeldoe and on the Jaguar harness, so perhaps I’ve give a review of them soon… or perhaps, I’ll write a new entry for the BDSM Lexicon. :)


Q:
Dear Dumb Domme, What is your take on having your Tweets favorited? Is it flattering/welcomed, pathetic and a waste of your time, or does it depend on the particular Twitter-er? The weight of my Twitter-verse depends on your answer!

A: It all depends, of course! In my mind, favoriting a Tweet is akin to the Facebook “like” button — to me, it says, “I read this, I liked it, I didn’t like it enough to retweet it, and I have no response.” It’s an acknowledgement — it’s nice, but nothing more than that. If I write or post something I’m particularly proud of, I am much happier when I’m retweeted. To me, retweeting says “I read this and I liked it enough to share it.” If someone retweets a link to something I’ve written, it means they liked what I wrote enough to pass it along to their Twitter friends. If someone retweets a linkless tweet, it means whatever I said was clever enough to be worth sharing. Let me put it this way: If we were dating, favoriting would be the equivalent of saying “Hey, D., you look nice today.” Retweeting would be the equivalent of “OMG, you guys… everybody look at my girlfriend! She is so fucking hot!” Telling me I look nice is sweet, but I’m an attention whore, so I’d much rather you shout about my hotness from the rooftops.  ;)

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  4 Responses to “ask-a-domme: pork, plugs, and pegging”

  1. “Oh grate an mighty Mistress, will You please peg me exactly the way i have fantasized it in every detail, living to fulfill my fantasy the way i have always imagined serving You as the most prefect salve of all time while listening to Steely Dan, dressed as a My Little Pony fury without using a safe word or even the slightest bit of could You please my fulfill of mighty Mistress of the most wonderful of all. Please?”

    I’m pretty sure I just peed my pants.

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