Feb 222012

J’s arms were spread wide and his were wrists bound to the corners of the bed. I laid down beside him, put my head on his chest, and toyed with his cock. As insignificant as this act seems, it’s one of my absolute favorite things to do. I love curling into him and cuddling with him while simultaneously abusing his cock. The contrasting sweetness and wickedness of that one little act is so beautiful to me.

I don’t know how long I was out, but some time later, I woke up with my head on his chest, his now soft cock still in my hand.

“Oh my god… I’m so sorry!” I was mortified. I had fallen asleep in the middle of play time, with J still uncomfortably bound to the bed.

“It’s okay. You’re tired. I wanted to let you sleep.”

“But your wrists… ” I stammered as I shook off the confusion and released him as quickly as I could, “I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I did that.”

“You shouldn’t apologize for falling asleep. You were tired.” He was so gentle and kind. I suspect J is finally coming to understand how much I hate feeling embarrassed. It destroys me. I hate that about myself, but I fear embarrassment more than anything I can think of, and this, this was embarrassing.

“But your wrists… no, I really am sorry.”

“It’s okay. It’s no big deal,” J said gently as he sat up and massaged his sore wrists.

“It’s not okay! It’s not! I… I… I fucked you in the ass, sat on your face, and then I fell asleep!”

J tried to maintain his composure to spare me the embarrassment, but that last line was too much for him. He burst into fits of laughter–the sort of deep, honest laughter that I love him for, the kind of laughter that’s contagious, the kind of laughter that makes me laugh too, despite my embarrassment.

I love him for that.

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