I have half a mind to take the ginger back to the market where I bought it, slam it down on the counter, and demand a refund. Well, I might consider asking for my money back if part of it hadn’t already been in someone’s ass. I might be uncomfortable explaining the problem to the grocery store clerk.
I wonder how that conversation would go?
Clerk: “Hello, Ma’am. How can I help you?”
Me: “Yes, I’d like to return this ginger.”
Clerk: “What’s wrong with it?”
Me: “It doesn’t work.”
Clerk: “What do you mean it doesn’t work? It looks perfectly fine to me. Did you use some of it in a recipe?”
Me: “No. I didn’t use it in a recipe. I put it in my submissive’s ass and nothing happened. It doesn’t work and I’d like my money back.”
I took a special trip out to the market, selected a good hand, and I took a considerable amount of time peeling it, and painstakingly carving it into a plug and several julienne sticks all with perfectly rounded ends.
We tried some urethral figging and J appeared unphased. I was disappointed with the effect, and so we tried the ginger butt plug. No fireworks there either. I was unsure if I had a bad hand of ginger or whether J’s pain tolerance was particularly high.
Frustrated, I quickly and crudely peeled and cut another piece, shoved it into my pussy, and spent the next twenty minutes going about my business. Nothing… no burn, no tingle, no nothing.
That was a let down. Stupid ginger.
(Now I read that some people let the ginger “ferment” before using it? According to the interwebs, “fermenting” ginger for figging means leaving it int the fridge in a plastic bag until the skin discolors and mold spots develop. No thanks. It’s strange enough shoving perfectly good produce into someone’s ass. There’s no way I’m shoving moldy produce into someone’s ass.)