Dec 302011
 

For your amusement (and for your information), I present the eleventh installment in Dumb Domme’s BDSM Lexicon, “genderqueer.” Ok, there aren’t necessarily overlaps between genderqueer and BDSM, but I’m including the term anyway. I’m allowed. It’s my blog.

View all past entries here.


genderqueer, adj., n., /ˈdʒɛndərkwɪ(ə)r/ (IPA) [jen-derkweer](spelled) 

Definition*:

genderqueer, n.: A person who rejects the notion of a gender binary. A person who identifies as genderqueer may consider themselves as being both male and female or as being neither male nor female.

genderqueer, adj.: May be used to describe people or things that have characteristics of both male and female or may be used to describe a person or thing being without gender.


Usage:

“Chris doesn’t consider ‘male’ or ‘female’ useful in personal descriptions, so Chris identifies as genderqueer.”

“Sure, this is my wife’s purse, but since I’m carrying it, I prefer to call it a ‘man pouch.’ I guess maybe it’s a genderqueer satchel? Or maybe it’s just a fucking bag.”


Sometimes Associated Terms
:

Gender Neutral Pronouns: such as ne, e, ey, hu, hy, ot, yt, thon, ve, xe, ze, zhe, en, co, phe, per, and yo, among others. I’m totally not kidding, and that’s just the nominatives and doesn’t include the ones from Futurama or Espiranto. I’m just going to go ahead and propose my own: “uck.”

Gender-Fluid: A person who may feel/be/behave more “male” one day and may feel/be/behave more “female” the next. I get it, but “gender-fluid” makes me think of ejaculate. So, if I giggle when you identify as “gender-fluid,” that’s why… because it sounds like you identify yourself as ejaculate.

Post-Gender: Umm, as in after gender? Oh boy. Oh human. Oh zhe? Oh zhit.

Supra-Gender: Like, above gender? Beyond gender? As in, gender is soooo yesterday?


Dumb (Domme) Discussion:

Honestly, anyone who doesn’t understand that gender is a spectrum is fucking stupid. There is no such thing as 100% male or 100% female if we consider the epic combination of biology, psychology, and culture that makes us what we are. Most of what we interpret as gender is dependent on appearance, behavior, and a set of culturally ascribed gendered-characteristics, and none of those things are stable or universal. Biological sex based on chromosomes and physiology may be “set” to some degree, but everything else is a cultural construct.

I’m not even going to get into the mass-destruction the mistaken notion of “gender binary” has caused. Presence/absence, self/other, male/female… ’tis too much for one post, and besides, explaining it makes me all bitchy zhe-tchy.


Genderqueer Symbol?:

genderqueer symbol

In various genderqueer, lgbt, transgendered online communities, it seems as if people are still struggling to find and agree on a symbol. Some people who identify as genderqueer seem hesitant to adopt the symbol.

There are a few genderqueer symbols floating around on the interwebs, and some seem to be gaining popularity. Below is one of my favorites. I can only describe it as sea-horse/dragon/hummingbird/skeleton with a purple large intestine.

genderqueer symbol: designed by Jess Five at VeganAnarchist. (WTF is a VeganAnarchist? All anarchy. No animal byproducts.)

 


* People use “genderqueer” is vastly different ways. There is no universally agreed upon definition. Like everything else, including gender, it’s meaning is dependent on the person using it, the audience, and the context in which it is used.

works consulted: “Gender Panic  “VeganAnarchist”   Wikipedia: “Genderqueer” and “Gender-neutral Pronoun”  a lot of resources I read and forgot to keep track of

  12 Responses to “BDSM Lexicon Entry #11: Genderqueer”

  1. "I get it, but "gender-fluid" makes me think of ejaculate. So, if I giggle when you identify as "gender-fluid," that's why… because it sounds like you identify yourself as ejaculate."

    Hee! Now every time I see the word gender-fluid I'm going to think of ejaculate too.

    "Honestly, anyone who doesn't understand that gender is a spectrum is fucking stupid."

    I completely agree. Pigeon-holing people because of their genitals or even their gender identity makes about as much sense as pigeon-holing people by their favourite flavour of ice-cream.

  2. @Stabbity: "Pigeon-holing people because of their genitals or even their gender identity makes about as much sense as pigeon-holing people by their favourite flavour of ice-cream."

    Oh zhit… I sure hope not. My favorite flavor is vanilla. :)

  3. Is it bad that I after reading this, the world makes much more sense now? There's just so many labels. I can never keep up.

    Lady D

  4. @Lady D: "Is it bad that I after reading this, the world makes much more sense now?"

    Yes! It's very bad! I do not recommend that anyone try to make sense of the world based on my writing (except me, of course). :) Maybe choosing "Dumb Domme" was a subconscious warning to readers. ha!

  5. "Supra-Gender" a Toyota sports car with either a deep throaty (masculine) or high pitched (feminine) sound as it annoys you when it drives down your street too fast.

  6. @emotepariah: LOVE IT!

  7. Why would you call those of us who respectfully disagree with your idea of a gender spectrum “fucking stupid”? Does such labeling make you feel better about your ideas? Or is it because such name calling makes you intellectually superior? Or am I overreacting at what was meant to be a joke? I would never call you “fucking stupid” for not agreeing with my ideas.

    • Why would you call those of us who respectfully disagree with your idea of a gender spectrum “fucking stupid”?

      Two points here:

      1. It’s not my idea — it’s not some theory I made up, nor is it something that can be disagreed with (unless you disagree with the dictionary/common definition of the word ‘gender’). I suspect you’re conflating the terms ‘sex’ and ‘gender’ — they don’t mean the same thing.

      In short, ‘sex’ is biologically and (physiologically) determined — it’s based on your anatomy. If you have a penis, your biological sex is male. If you have a vagina, your biological sex is female. ‘Gender’ is comprised of roles, behaviors, characteristics, etc. that we consider either ‘masculine’ or ‘feminine.’ Those things that make up gender (roles, behaviors, etc.) are socially and culturally constructed — they’re learned.

      2. You’re probably right in thinking my language was a little over-the-top, but I certainly wasn’t joking about gender being a spectrum. I stand by that statement.

      Perhaps instead of writing ‘anyone who doesn’t understand that gender is a spectrum is fucking stupid,’ I should have written ‘anyone who doesn’t understand that gender is a spectrum is fucking ignorant,’ or perhaps ‘…fucking uninformed.’ Better yet, I could have said ‘the conflation of sex and gender is ignorant/uninformed.’

      But I didn’t — I wrote “fucking stupid.” I suspect you realize I exaggerate and amplify for effect on these lexicon entries (as evidenced by references to a ‘gingerqueer’ cookie, man bags, Espiranto, and Futurama). If you didn’t realize that before, now you do. :)

      • Thank you for the clarification of the terms. You are right I have them confused. I never thought you were joking about your belief. I thought I had missed an attempt to be witty or sarcastic with the use of the phrase “fucking stupid” One should always stand behind one’s beliefs.

        Your use of “fucking stupid” to describe those who disagree with an idea you accept was meant for more than simply effect. You are intelligent; you are a fine writer. Such skill in writing is a well thought out process. A good writer, like yourself, is always looking for the right word, the right phrase. A good writer, like yourself, is always aware of connotation and denotation. A good writer, like yourself, is always looking for more that just exaggeration and amplification. A good writer, like yourself, is always looking for a meaning that will lie just beneath the surface. The real meaning of that phrase is clear. It is meant to ridicule and demean those who do not accept an idea you do. They are not just stupid, ignorant, and uniformed. They are “fucking stupid, ignorant, and uninformed” They are less than.

        I, too, stand behind what I said. I would never, not even for effect, refer to anyone as “fucking stupid” for not understanding.

        However, as my wife informed me, it is your blog, and you are free to ridicule and demean whomever you please, including me.

        Respectfully,
        Stan

        • Your use of “fucking stupid” to describe those who disagree with an idea you accept was meant for more than simply effect. [. . .] The real meaning of that phrase is clear. It is meant to ridicule and demean those who do not accept an idea you do.[. . .]

          While you have every right to interpret my meaning and guess at my intent, you have absolutely no right to tell me what my ‘real meaning’ is, what my writing is meant to do, or what my intention is.

          You have no access to any of that information, and your assertions to the contrary are either presumptuous, arrogant, or some combination of the two.

          A good writer, like yourself, is always looking for the right word, the right phrase. A good writer, like yourself, is always aware of connotation and denotation. A good writer, like yourself, is always looking for more that just exaggeration and amplification

          While I thank you for the compliment about my writing, what you suggest about “good writers” is reductive and over-generalizes ‘intent.’

          Yes, I often look for the “right” words and phrases, but what’s “right” is dependent on my intent, the topic, and a number of other factors. Sometimes the “right” word is the clearest, and other times it’s the one that’s left open to interpretation. Sometimes the right phrase is the one that accurately describes a thing, and sometimes it’s the phrase that has the right sound or rhythm, or the one that’s vague but captures a mood, or the one that’s completely ridiculous for effect.

          I, too, stand behind what I said. I would never, not even for effect, refer to anyone as “fucking stupid” for not understanding.

          Clearly, your intention is to assert your moral superiority. ;)

          Regardless of your intent, on this particular issue, you can have it. Moral superiority is all yours — I don’t want it.

  8. Thank you for taking the time to reply in such detail. Not many people would be willing to do that. It is greatly appreciated.

    I am aware of my character flaws. Arrogance is one of them. I monitor it, and do my best to hold it in check. Some times, I am successful, and other times, I am not. In any given moment, it can be difficult for me to be consciously aware of its presence. The people with whom I interact help me to see it. I thank you for your feedback.

    I wrote to you not to be malicious, nasty, superior, or to illicit anger. I do not want to assume that I know what your feelings are towards my correspondence. I have a sense that, at the very least, it has made you uncomfortable. For that, I sincerely apologize.

    Respectfully,
    Stan

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